If it was up to me, Miley Cyrus’ seven-year career will end much sooner than Cher’s forty-year legacy. A few years back, Cher announced her “Farewell Tour” and paved the way for her retirement. (And I had to hide all the sharp objects in my house from my overwhelmed, self-inflicted, disco-diva mother.) Now it seems like Cher just won’t stop: She recently announced her North-American, five-month, “Dressed to Kill” tour. (more)
After you combine one part jam-band, the lingering smell of spilled bong water fused with cool ranch Doritos, and finally, the sound of acoustic guitar blared from your mother’s basement, you potentially get a band known as Phish. If I wanted to listen to someone that doesn’t wash his hair rattle on about peace, love, and understanding, I’d take my time machine back to Woodstock . But for those of you Phish fans reading this, you’ll be happy to know the band announced some upcoming shows.
Please brace yourselves for the hipster apocalypse; Mumford & Sons are on an indefinite hiatus. Instructions go as follows: Evacuate to your nearest Blick, Urban Outfitters, Salvation Army, or Chipotle’s. Please bring a beanie and scarf regardless of the sunshine and high temps. And finally make sure you Vine it, otherwise how will we ever know that it really happened? (more)
Just in case you haven’t heard the song “Blurred Lines” enough this summer, (of course, you would have to be living in an underground hut in Neptune and somehow connecting with WiFi to read this) you can hear it again during Robin Thicke’s fifteen-city nationwide tour. (more)
Las Vegas dancers, strippers, and gamblers alike are welcoming a new neighbor and “It’s Britney, b***h!” On September 17, Britney Spears announced her Las Vegas residency on “Good Morning America” where she was greeted by 1,000 of her fans. (more)
MGMT has just announced a North American headlining tour. I’m telling you now before you have to listen to an indie-elitist lecture you on the band’s name (it’s actually pronounced “the Management”) and let him prove once and for all, the only relationship he’ll have the rest of his life is with his blog. (Extra points if you let him know that no one reads it.) (more)
The best way to learn what Jay Z is up to is by reading Kanye West news. While the duo released “Watch the Throne” two years back, the competition seems fierce. When West was promoting his recent album, Yeezus, Jay Z announced his album release, Magna Carta Holy Grail, at the same time. Now Jay is back at it again: He announced his “Magna Carter World Tour” last Friday, the same day that West announced his “Yeezus Tour.” (more)